Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Training Your Significant Other

I'm super lucky to have Fiance in my life.  We've been dating for just over 4 years now, and I couldn't be happier.

Because I have trained him well.

Here is my patented list of ways to TRAIN your significant other.

1) Reward them for every little thing!  Opened the door for you? Give him a kiss!  Cooked you dinner?  Give her a kiss!  Cleaned up the house while you were gone?  Give 'em a kiss!  It's very important to let them know that you appreciate everything they do.  This will make your significant other more likely to do things for you!  Eventually you can phase out the rewards.

2) Disguise your requests for slave labor.  Don't ask him to come do all the chores and cleaning help you out.  Ask them to come over for a moment.  Give them a reward, and then mention your need in an offhand way.  "Oh, hey, while you're here, could you hang this up for me please?" Keep this up, and he will come every time you call, no matter what you need!

3) Never hesitate to correct your significant other when they step out of line.  A swift, and prompt punishment is important whenever your significant other steps out of line, or they will continue their negative behavior.

4) Remember that rewards should be interspersed randomly after the association between a behavior and the reward is established.  This way, they will continue to do the positive behavior hoping for the reward to come, because they never know when they will get it.

5)  When out and about, if your significant other doesn't want to go along with you to a particular store, give him a sharp tug in the right direction.  He will follow you happily.

Remember, folks, training your significant other is a lot like training a dog!  Except better, because they don't pee on the carpet, and the best rewards get enjoyed by both of you! (i.e. sex)

9 comments:

  1. Wow, it really is like training a dog! What kind of punishments or "corrections" do you suggest? I'm a fan of spanking, personally ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Spanking is a good one. I also recommend withholding sex, refusing to shave, giving the cold shoulder or silent treatment, or light to moderate bondage!....you know, if that's your thing.

    If you want to pull out the BIG guns though, you can always just call his mother!

    ReplyDelete
  3. 6. Don't treat S.O. as a dog. Will not respond to "stay" or "Bad [Name]"

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm not sure #5 works... I've been shopping with a few girlfriends and usually I can pull harder than they can. And we end up in the electronics store. If they do get me into a clothing or shoe store, I put on the "this is so fucking boring I might actually set myself on fire just to see what it feels like" face, which generally works a treat.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I started to reward my SO when he did things unasked around the house. Except that it happens so infrequently, I think the training is irrelevant.

    ReplyDelete
  6. My husband does a better job at training me than I do at training him...

    ReplyDelete
  7. "Training"? SOs have to be trained now? And here I thought letting each other be themselves was a reward all their own. :)

    But seriously, I'm with Lost on #5... tugging never works. It just starts a tug war. Plus, I'd rather be shopping at electronics stores anyway, so win/win. Lol.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Tugging can work, but I guess it depends on the S.O. It's much more effective if you let SO drag you around all day, then he will happily follow you.

    Also, Aussie, if you have to reward him infrequently, reward him with higher value rewards. Did he just put the laundry away? JUMP HIM!!! Give him a time he won't forget! The key is for him to subconsciously make the association. Also, reward him with lesser rewards when does things you ask him to. He might eventually start doing those things without being asked. =)

    ReplyDelete
  9. I think my fiancé has me trained...I'm pretty sure I wouldn't spend so much time on his xbox or watching Top Gear if I wasn't so well trained... :P

    ReplyDelete